Not a week goes by after Husband comes home from a training run that he has a story about how someone refuses to follow the rules of our running/biking/walking/rollerblading trails and almost causes an accident. Apparently folks like to use the center of the trail instead of keeping to the right hand side. Verbally signaling when they are about to pass someone, which should be on the left, doesn't always happen either.
The first time we watched Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier (we see every Marvel movie at least three times in the theater) Husband leaned over and excitedly whispered in my ear, “See! See! Captain America has good running etiquette!” during the scene where Steve Rodgers is out for a jog and calls out, “on your left” every time he passes a fellow runner.
I knew right then and there I needed to give Husband a Captain America On Your Left t shirt as a gift. I couldn't find one in a store so I made one! You can too. Here’s how.
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
Captain America On Your Left T Shirt
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11/25/2014 08:01:00 AM
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Thursday, November 20, 2014
How to Hide an Emergency Tool Box in Your Hair
Husband saw personalized Swiss Army type knives in a shop when we were on vacation one year. In a rare impulse buy we ended up with His and Hers Swiss Army knives. Husband got silly giddy and said I HAD to have the knife with Handyman engraved on it. Husband bought a matching one with his name on it to replace the knife he lost.
We changed Handyman to Handyma’am with my wood burning tool when we got home.
Husband uses the screwdriver on his Swiss Army knife all the time so yeah, of course, I’m all for him getting a replacement.
Me? I didn’t think I’d use it but if at all but if all it takes to make Husband happy is to carry a Handyma’am Swiss Army knife in the bottom of my purse I get off easy don’t I?
Thing is, the guy knows how handy those little emergency tool kit knives are. He was right and I was wrong. Those little tools have gotten me out of a jam time and time again. For example, if you follow @condoblues on Instagram (click and follow pretty please?) you might have already seen this Doomsday scenario the corkscrew on my Swiss Army knife helped my sister and I avoid on a Saturday night.
We changed Handyman to Handyma’am with my wood burning tool when we got home.
Husband uses the screwdriver on his Swiss Army knife all the time so yeah, of course, I’m all for him getting a replacement.
Me? I didn’t think I’d use it but if at all but if all it takes to make Husband happy is to carry a Handyma’am Swiss Army knife in the bottom of my purse I get off easy don’t I?
Thing is, the guy knows how handy those little emergency tool kit knives are. He was right and I was wrong. Those little tools have gotten me out of a jam time and time again. For example, if you follow @condoblues on Instagram (click and follow pretty please?) you might have already seen this Doomsday scenario the corkscrew on my Swiss Army knife helped my sister and I avoid on a Saturday night.
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11/20/2014 08:55:00 AM
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Thursday, October 23, 2014
Craft Fail, the Book!
Craft FAIL When Handmade Goes Horribly Wrong by Heather Mann
More often than not, in between the coming up with a crazy scheme stage and the perfect beauty shot stage there is an epic fail stage like the time I tried to make homemade shaving cream and it exploded all over my kitchen.
The fuzzy spots in the photo are shaving cream on my camera lens.
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10/23/2014 04:23:00 PM
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Thursday, October 9, 2014
How to Make a Fluffy No Sew Tutu
I need a costume for a performance. I came up with a costume idea with a kooky Dresden Dolls, Steampunk, Katy Perry, vaudeville kind of vibe. Best of all I my costume includes a tutu!
I have always wanted to dance in a tutu as a kid but unfortunately modern dancers don't do the tutu. Sorry Martha Graham, this gal is making her long denied tutu dreams come true!
I have always wanted to dance in a tutu as a kid but unfortunately modern dancers don't do the tutu. Sorry Martha Graham, this gal is making her long denied tutu dreams come true!
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10/09/2014 08:00:00 AM
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Thursday, September 25, 2014
9 Things to Do When Your Bathroom Floods
This was supposed to be a post about how I fixed the leaking faucet I found during my grout the bathroom tile project.
Instead it turned into a how to dry out a flooded bathroom and kitchen post.
Instead it turned into a how to dry out a flooded bathroom and kitchen post.
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9/25/2014 08:01:00 AM
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Monday, September 15, 2014
No Sew Halloween Apron
My sister and I are foodies. We often send each other email with the subject line MAKE THIS and a recipe. During one of our conversations the subject turned to food, as it usually does, and how cooking messes can ruin clothes.
There is a solution for that. It’s called an apron.
Halloween is my sister’s favorite holiday. We share the same warped sense of humor. I made her a no sew apron I know she’ll wear for Halloween and quite possibly during the rest of the year to serve as a funny warning to others.
There is a solution for that. It’s called an apron.
Halloween is my sister’s favorite holiday. We share the same warped sense of humor. I made her a no sew apron I know she’ll wear for Halloween and quite possibly during the rest of the year to serve as a funny warning to others.
Don’t Make Me Poison Your Dinner Apron
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9/15/2014 08:00:00 AM
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Sunday, September 7, 2014
Guardians of the Galaxy Craft Awesome Mix Tape USB Flash Drive
Marvel released a new superhero movie and of course Husband has seen Guardians of the Galaxy multiple times. Me too.
I didn't' know much if anything about Guardians of the Galaxy until Husband dug out an old Guardians comic book for me to read before we saw the movie. The Guardians in the movie are the same bunch of space jerks as they are in the comic books. The only difference is the movie has a much better soundtrack due to Peter Quill's mom making her son a real live 1980's style mix tape. Peter (aka Star Lord) he plays it in his Sony Walkman as he roams the galaxy.
We have a USB port in our car, not a cassette player. The only way we can play Peter's Awesome Mix Vol 1. is if I decorate a thumb storage drive as an Awesome Mix Volume One cassette tape.
I didn't' know much if anything about Guardians of the Galaxy until Husband dug out an old Guardians comic book for me to read before we saw the movie. The Guardians in the movie are the same bunch of space jerks as they are in the comic books. The only difference is the movie has a much better soundtrack due to Peter Quill's mom making her son a real live 1980's style mix tape. Peter (aka Star Lord) he plays it in his Sony Walkman as he roams the galaxy.
Yep, that's a TARDIS USB hub on my desk! Many of you asked where I got it. I bought my USB TARDIS hub from Amazon here.
We have a USB port in our car, not a cassette player. The only way we can play Peter's Awesome Mix Vol 1. is if I decorate a thumb storage drive as an Awesome Mix Volume One cassette tape.
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9/07/2014 12:30:00 AM
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Tuesday, August 5, 2014
How to Pad and Tape a Color Guard Rifle
The same band I marched with in in the Presidential Inauguration Parade last year has another amazing performance opportunity. I’m stoked to be spinning flag in a real blow and go drum and bugle corps style show since that is absolutely not the type of show my small town marching band did and my drum corps loving heart desired. YES! *fist pump*
Then I found out the color guard is twirling rifle too. I haven’t done that since high school winter color guard.
Gulp!
I bought a color guard rifle which is basically a big hunk of non firing wood in a rifle-esque shape. Before I practice throwing it in the air like I don’t care (as one does when spinning rifle) I need to reinforce the rifle with tape and pad the ends so it won’t break in twoif when I drop it during practice.
Then I found out the color guard is twirling rifle too. I haven’t done that since high school winter color guard.
Gulp!
I bought a color guard rifle which is basically a big hunk of non firing wood in a rifle-esque shape. Before I practice throwing it in the air like I don’t care (as one does when spinning rifle) I need to reinforce the rifle with tape and pad the ends so it won’t break in two
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8/05/2014 05:32:00 PM
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Thursday, July 31, 2014
How to Purge and Recycle Old Electronics
I swear our house is shrinking. Once upon a time, had storage space to burn. (Don’t. It wastes a perfectly good space and might catch the rest of your house on fire.)
It didn’t take any great detective work to determine why our house is shrinking. The answer is easy.
We have stuff we don’t think/aren’t sure if there is a place to recycle or responsibly dispose of it. The last time I checked this wasn't the case, or if there was such an animal, it was only accepted those things on that one day during a full moon when cows do backward sneezes kind of thing. Hello hazardous household waste collection, I’m talking to you.
It didn’t take any great detective work to determine why our house is shrinking. The answer is easy.
We have stuff we don’t think/aren’t sure if there is a place to recycle or responsibly dispose of it. The last time I checked this wasn't the case, or if there was such an animal, it was only accepted those things on that one day during a full moon when cows do backward sneezes kind of thing. Hello hazardous household waste collection, I’m talking to you.
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7/31/2014 09:23:00 AM
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Wednesday, July 23, 2014
How to Fix a Hole in Shorts without Sewing!
All of my summer shorts are too big after I met my weight loss goal. It is a nice problem to have.
Fortunately, I had a couple of pairs of pants lurking in the back of my closet that make better shorts than pants. It didn’t take much time or effort to cut and hem the pants into shorts (learn how I make pants into shorts here.) It is a trick my mom used when I blew out a knee on a pair of pants or jeans as a kid. Boom. I got a new pair of shorts.
Green. Cheap. And most importantly, I had the perfect pair of shorts that weren’t too short or too long.
Fortunately, I had a couple of pairs of pants lurking in the back of my closet that make better shorts than pants. It didn’t take much time or effort to cut and hem the pants into shorts (learn how I make pants into shorts here.) It is a trick my mom used when I blew out a knee on a pair of pants or jeans as a kid. Boom. I got a new pair of shorts.
Green. Cheap. And most importantly, I had the perfect pair of shorts that weren’t too short or too long.
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7/23/2014 08:02:00 AM
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Sunday, July 13, 2014
Our Getaway to Put-in-Bay
While Lacey’s separation anxiety is a wee bit better, but it still goes to orange alert level often enough that Husband and I haven’t taken a vacation since she joined our family.
WE NEED A VACATION.
I suggested we go to Put-in-Bay. It is close enough to go home early if we need to and still far enough away that it is Not Home.
This trip also fixes a hideous wrong I committed while growing up in on Lake Erie. I have never actually been to the Lake Erie Islands. I think I broke a local ordinance or something.
Whoops.
We knew we wanted to visit both islands. I wasn’t sure which one we should stay on. I arbitrarily picked staying on Put-in-Bay and I’m glad I did.
There were more things we were interested in doing on Put-in-Bay although I had to fulfill a childhood science class obligation and take a day trip to Kelley’s Island.
Every single science teacher used the Great Lakes and the Kelley’s Island Glacial Groves as an example of how the glaciers changed the landscape after the they receded. I finally saw them in person!
WE NEED A VACATION.
I suggested we go to Put-in-Bay. It is close enough to go home early if we need to and still far enough away that it is Not Home.
This trip also fixes a hideous wrong I committed while growing up in on Lake Erie. I have never actually been to the Lake Erie Islands. I think I broke a local ordinance or something.
Whoops.
We knew we wanted to visit both islands. I wasn’t sure which one we should stay on. I arbitrarily picked staying on Put-in-Bay and I’m glad I did.
There were more things we were interested in doing on Put-in-Bay although I had to fulfill a childhood science class obligation and take a day trip to Kelley’s Island.
Every single science teacher used the Great Lakes and the Kelley’s Island Glacial Groves as an example of how the glaciers changed the landscape after the they receded. I finally saw them in person!
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7/13/2014 09:00:00 AM
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Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Viking Ship Dining Room Table
THIS.
WANT.
Update: 9/10/14 Reader Mia gave me the source of the artist who created this beautiful Viking long boat table. UNIKA-Rógvi à Bø, design and craft is the artist and craftsman of this stunning work.
Update: 9/10/14 Reader Mia gave me the source of the artist who created this beautiful Viking long boat table. UNIKA-Rógvi à Bø, design and craft is the artist and craftsman of this stunning work.
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7/08/2014 06:19:00 PM
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Wednesday, July 2, 2014
20 Super Fun Super Sized Outdoor Games
I played a lot of board games as a kid. Between my friends and I, we had and played all of the major games from Candyland to Ants in the Pants to Stratego. (Disclosure: I am included big bold affiliate links in this post for your convenience.)
That’s why I love this trend of super sizing childhood games and playing them outside. If you want ideas on what outdoor games to play at your next cookout or BBQ, think back to the board games you loved to play as a kid and make it giant size!
That’s why I love this trend of super sizing childhood games and playing them outside. If you want ideas on what outdoor games to play at your next cookout or BBQ, think back to the board games you loved to play as a kid and make it giant size!
20 Big Backyard Games
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7/02/2014 10:17:00 AM
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Thursday, June 19, 2014
DIY Personalized Insulated Wine Glass Tumblers
Husband’s family likes to get together in the summer for a family reunion. Grandparents, brothers, sisters, aunts, and uncles gather for good times and good food. Every night the adults open a bottle of wine start a round of Euchre. Playing cards is our excuse to stay up way too late telling stories and busting a gut laughing at each other’s jokes. I’m so glad I married into this family.
I bought a reusable BPA free insulated wine glass tumbler to use instead of a disposable cup for the reunion. I want to personalize my insulated tumbler so I know which one is mine at the party.
Decorated insulated wine glass tumblers: Mommy’s Special Lemonade, Oh No! My glass is empty! It’s an Emergency! Quick, call WINE-ONE-ONE!, Mommy’s Sippy Cup, and If you met my family you’d understand.
I bought a reusable BPA free insulated wine glass tumbler to use instead of a disposable cup for the reunion. I want to personalize my insulated tumbler so I know which one is mine at the party.
Decorated insulated wine glass tumblers: Mommy’s Special Lemonade, Oh No! My glass is empty! It’s an Emergency! Quick, call WINE-ONE-ONE!, Mommy’s Sippy Cup, and If you met my family you’d understand.
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6/19/2014 05:25:00 PM
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Monday, June 2, 2014
Minion Cell Phone Holder
I’m famous for asking people to call my phone because I can’t remember where I put it after I take it out of my purse. It’s kind of important to keep track of it since my cell phone is also my home phone.
Stuart (my favorite Despicable Me minion!) offered to help me out and allow me to make him into a Happy Meal toy cell phone stand. Stuart came into my life last summer when Christina from A Mommy Story and I did a Thelma and Louise road trip to Blogher last summer.
Well, we were just like them if Thelma and Louise drove an SUV and the wildest thing they did was stop at McDonalds for lunch and Stuarts and not share them with children. Then yeah, that’s us.
Stuart (my favorite Despicable Me minion!) offered to help me out and allow me to make him into a Happy Meal toy cell phone stand. Stuart came into my life last summer when Christina from A Mommy Story and I did a Thelma and Louise road trip to Blogher last summer.
Well, we were just like them if Thelma and Louise drove an SUV and the wildest thing they did was stop at McDonalds for lunch and Stuarts and not share them with children. Then yeah, that’s us.
How to Make an Action Figure Cell Phone, Ereader, or Tablet Stand
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Sunday, March 9, 2014
Decoupage Bed Makeover
I’m decorating and making over the Room Where Old Furniture Goes to Die. Some people call it the guest/craft room but not many.
The guest bed frame was a freebie from my old boss. It needed a little DIY love. Scratch that. The bed needed A LOT of DIY love. I knew the stain was chipped and scratched but I didn’t realize there were small cracks in the head and foot boards. The side rails were pretty beat up too.
I made over an old bed frame with Mod Page and paint!
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Wednesday, January 29, 2014
I Hate Winter Cabin Fever Indoor Beach Party: Décor
We. Are. Going. Stir. Crazy!
The Winter That Will Not End is giving Husband and I have a serious case of Cabin Fever. We’ve had to cancel a lot of activities due to white out conditions and icy roads.
Even Lacey is feeling it. Poor thing hasn’t had a proper walk in weeks due to the snow and dangerously low temperatures.
Husband decided to spice things up by sharing his cold with me. Now I’m fighting Cabin Fever AND a cold – blah!
We can’t make a quick trip South to soak up some sun because you guys are getting are getting it too.
Complaining about it won’t make the winter blahs go away either.
I’m fighting Cabin Fever the only way I know how.
I’m making fun of it!
I’m inviting your to a n I’m Tired of Winter Let’s Have a Beach Party party on my blogs Condo Blues and Lazy Budget Chef!
The Winter That Will Not End is giving Husband and I have a serious case of Cabin Fever. We’ve had to cancel a lot of activities due to white out conditions and icy roads.
Even Lacey is feeling it. Poor thing hasn’t had a proper walk in weeks due to the snow and dangerously low temperatures.
Husband decided to spice things up by sharing his cold with me. Now I’m fighting Cabin Fever AND a cold – blah!
We can’t make a quick trip South to soak up some sun because you guys are getting are getting it too.
Complaining about it won’t make the winter blahs go away either.
I’m fighting Cabin Fever the only way I know how.
I’m making fun of it!
I’m inviting your to a n I’m Tired of Winter Let’s Have a Beach Party party on my blogs Condo Blues and Lazy Budget Chef!
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1/29/2014 08:59:00 PM
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Sunday, December 8, 2013
How to Make a Ho Ho Ho Christmas House Flag
I like to hang a flag as part of my outdoor Christmas décor because it helps my guests identify my house in a neighborhood where most of the houses look a like.
I usually go with flying the Dannenberg at Christmas per Danish tradition. Unfortunately, my Danish flag has flown more than its share of holidays and birthdays (another Danish tradition) and needs to be replaced.
Lacey’s first Christmas with us is the perfect time to start a new Christmas flag tradition.
I used fabric I had on hand to replace my nylon flag with a cloth homemade Christmas flag. I used a little bit of mathematical/scientific/geek shorthand to make Ho cubed because I didn’t have room for Ho, Ho, Ho.
Husband didn’t buy that excuse either.
Then we had a comic in depth discussion on the correct way to Ho, Ho, Ho. I say it should be mathematical, Ho cubed. Husband argued it should be scientific notation H three O three.
I usually go with flying the Dannenberg at Christmas per Danish tradition. Unfortunately, my Danish flag has flown more than its share of holidays and birthdays (another Danish tradition) and needs to be replaced.
Lacey’s first Christmas with us is the perfect time to start a new Christmas flag tradition.
I didn’t say it was a good tradition, just a new and funny one.
Husband didn’t buy that excuse either.
Then we had a comic in depth discussion on the correct way to Ho, Ho, Ho. I say it should be mathematical, Ho cubed. Husband argued it should be scientific notation H three O three.
How to Make a Geek Christmas Flag
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Sunday, November 3, 2013
Drop Cloth Patio Chair Covers
It only took me 8 years to realize I should do something to protect the chairs on my front porch from rain and winter snow unless I want to keep making my chairs over every two years or so.
That is not a difficult thing to do. But I’d rather spend that time working on a new project, like helping our girl Lacey become a balanced and confident dog. That project gives kisses!
My chair projects do not give me kisses.
Sad Lisa
That is not a difficult thing to do. But I’d rather spend that time working on a new project, like helping our girl Lacey become a balanced and confident dog. That project gives kisses!
My chair projects do not give me kisses.
Sad Lisa
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11/03/2013 12:54:00 PM
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Thursday, October 31, 2013
Highball Halloween Party!
Happy Halloween!
Today is one our favorite holidays because it is all about frivolous fun. I got my costumer on and made a rare set of matching costumes for Husband and I to wear to this year’s Highball Halloween party. We were Raving Rabbids!
I’m glad I made our full length Rabbid suits from fleece. It was freezing that night!
Today is one our favorite holidays because it is all about frivolous fun. I got my costumer on and made a rare set of matching costumes for Husband and I to wear to this year’s Highball Halloween party. We were Raving Rabbids!
BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!
I’m glad I made our full length Rabbid suits from fleece. It was freezing that night!
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10/31/2013 08:00:00 AM
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